meltingaway

I was having a good day until 7:00pm.  I had just gotten out of a meeting and caved.  I went to Braums and got a large frozen yogurt twist.  I did some shopping and then went to Sonic.  I pulled in looked at the menu and talked myself out ordering anything.  I left there and went to the other Braums because I was convinced I needed another frozen yogurt, and heaven forbid the same person wait on me and see I was eating 2 in one night. Before I got in the drive through line I remembered I am out of milk and eggs and don’t have anything for breakfast in the morning.   I parked and went in.  I still bought more than I needed.  I bought skim milk, a dozen eggs, a block of pepper jack cheese, and a package of deli sliced turkey.  I came home opened the cheese and turkey ate some of both then logged in here to kick myself. 

I know ice cream and frozen yogurt set off a benge every time I eat them.  I don’t bring it in the house for that reason.  I normally try to ignore Sonic and Braums when I pass them so I don’t pull in.  I am very frustrated with myself at the moment.  This can not be normal behavior.  Food should not be all consuming this way.  It is almost 9:00 and I have a long day tomorrow.  I think I just need to go to bed and get a good night’s sleep.  That is another time I eat more than I should.  I have even less control when I am tired and I passed tired 3 days ago.  

Okay deep breath, what’s done is done.  I can only make every effort to do better tomorrow, and tomorrow will be better.

I didn’t reach all of my goals last week.  So I adjusted them and added to what I was able to do.  The smaller realistic workout you do is always better than the longer unrealistic workout you never do.  I plan to walk at least 3.5 miles, drink 64 oz of water 5 of 7 days, and lose 2 pounds.  Last week I walked 2.5 miles, drank 64 oz of water 4 of 7 days, and lost 4 pounds. I know myself well enough to keep the pounds number low.  When I have high expectations to lose I become too easily discouraged and then lose all my motivation and drive.  And this about more than the number on the scale.  It’s about making healthy choices and being able to move my body.  I think that is the worst part about being fat for me personally, not being able to move the way I would like to move.   Today I will make the choice, set the goals, and celebrate the successes that will take off the pounds and allow me to move the way my body is designed to move.